Quick Peek at my World

Sa Isla ng Talim, mga ibo'y nananahan Pugad itinayo sa pusod ng kagubatan Ayungi'y dinadagit sa tubig na may kalamigan Sa gitna ng hanging habagat o amihan Tatagpasin ang ulan, hangin at lamig Kanawa'y lilipad sa malapad na langit Bubulusok paibaba sa malamig na tubig Iimbulog paitaas, ayungin sa bibig nakapiit Pag isda'y nadagit kanaway muling lilipad Sa pusod ng kagubatan, pakpak ay mapapadpad Bitbit ang ayunging kanina'y dinalupadpad Tungo sa naghihintay na inakay sa pugad Saan mang dako ipanig ang paningin Tao man, o ibon rin Lalayo ang ama o inahin Ngunit babalik sa pugad, upang inaka'y pakainin Sa kabila ng lahat ng susuunging hirap Magulang o kanaway patuloy na magsisikap Di alintana mga balakid na makakaharap Maitaguyod ang anak, siyang tanging pinapangarap Clerissa Carritero-Austria Dec. 7, 2003 Isla ng Talim Note: This poem was first published in Manila East Watch Vol 3 Issue 19 Dec 15-21, 2003

Nagsimula sa ngiti, asaran at kantiyawan. Hanggang sa kalauna’y nauwi, sa malalim na pagmamahalan.. Hindi alintana mga balakid at pagsubok na haharapin. Lahat ng ito ay kakayanin, manatili lang na ika’y akin. Lungkot ay naging saya, luha napalitan ng ligaya. Pag-ibig na iyong ibinigay, sa puso ko mananatili habang buhay. Pero kahit anung gawin, mga problema darating. Away, selos at pagdududa, lagi padin papagitna sa atin. Ang tanging hiling ko sa’yo aking mahal, Sa tuwing pagsubok ay nariyan, palagi mo sanang iisipin.. Ako ang nasa pagitan, ng madilim na kahapon at magandang bukas.. Ako ang bubura sa mapait na alaala ng nakaraan, at maliwanag na hinaharap ay sisimulan. Ako ang magmamahal sayo ngaion, bukas at hanggang sa banda pa roon. Ako ang kasama mo bubuo at tutupad ng mga pangarap.. Kahit alam ko, sa huli ay ndi ako kasama ni sa hinagap. Kaya huwag ka muna bibitaw aking mahal, puso ay hindi pa handa. Kahit pa alam ko.. at tanggap ko.. Na ikaw ay hindi ...

I see your name.. and it all flashes back. The memories.. The secret smiles.. The light touches.. The sweet kisses. I hear your voice.. and it all rushes in. The places we've seen.. The people we've met.. The food we've tasted.. The laughter we've shared. I see your picture.. and the tears slowly fall. Because I miss the smile on your face.. Miss the tight hugs you gave.. Miss the moments we've shared.. And because deep down I know.. It's now all part of the past. Something that we cannot go back to.. No matter how hard we want it to be. There is no US anymore.. All that's left is YOU with Her.. And ME with Him.

Mylove... Tomorrow, I want to wake up.. to the smell of seawater teasing my nose; to the feel of the early morning sun slowly kissing my face.. to the sound of gently crashing waves in the distance; And to the feel of your arms around my waist.. Tonight, I lie in bed thinking... of the way we held hands while looking at the corals underwater; of the way you smiled at me while on our boat ride. of the silent message you send when you look into my eyes; And the quick little embraces you make all the time. Yes, it's hard to sleep thinking about you. But as I think and ponder tonight, I will fall into sleep with a smile on my lips. For tomorrow is yet another day to make more memories with you. Those I can store for the many sleepless nights that I spend without you. Fear not, for you are my last thought tonight.. the hero in my dreams.. and the ray of sunshine of my tomorrow.

I want to feel nothing.. I want to act like I don't care.. I want to show you that I can live without you.. And that I can love again The truth is... I died today. I felt my heart breaking into a million pieces... My day turned into a black world full of nothingness.. You made me so broken that I don't know if I will ever see sunshine again.. But I'm strong.. I know I am. I will find someone who will deserve my love ... and love me back in return. Someone who will not throw me away. And someone who will be there to light up my days again. Thank you for hurting me deeply. For breaking my heart. For showing me that I am nothing. Because now, you made me fall out of love for you. I can now completely forget you.. without feeling guilty. Thank you. Because now, I am free.

I hate... commuting. 'Coz it makes me sit still, and gives me time to think. about how insignifacant I am, in this vast universe I am in. I hate.. sad movies. 'Coz it makes me lose hope, it tells me that there is an end. and that no matter how hard you try, In the end, you still cry. I hate.. love songs. It tells you how others loved and lost. How feelings are not reciprocated. It shows you glimpses of past ghosts, Of love that was there before. I hate.. rain. 'Coz it spells sadness, and it symbolizes tears. The pitter patter of raindrops from the sky, makes me wither and die inside. I hate.. that moment when you lie in bed and think. Of what you're supposed to do with your life, Of what you would be when you die. It tells me that no matter how many good things you did in this lifetime, That no matter how much you loved and cared...In the end when you close your eyes, and when the darkness envelops your being... You will ...

The sea is calling, My feet miss the sand.. Sunrise or sunset, Are both pretty where I stand.. Hot days, cold nights; Sadness and Despair.. All cured in an instant, Whenever I'm there.. Wait for me, my friend sea.. So you can wrap me in your waves again. Refresh me with your gentle breeze, Chase away the sorrows, before it begins.